The Biden Show

Thank Goodness we have a president who lets us be underestimated! You know, they say being underestimated is a blessing, and Biden knows it – obviously. He is so doggon consistent!

Last week, he was in Cambodia and – clever like a fox – he thanked the assembled world leaders for hosting the thing in Colombia, that other hot country, other side of the globe. Damn, he is good!

You can see where this is going. He has pretended for years he loves China, pretended to let his son take money from the Communists, flew him over there, letting them think they were making inroads, you know.

He even gave them the artificial islands, sent his vice president over to confuse North and South Korea, probably insisted his son drop that laptop off with an “enemy of the state,” thinking it would leak. Good, good, good – so darn good.  

As if he is reading from a script for everything – he reads from a script for everything, even slipping in the occasional “stop reading here” and “pick a commie for question one.” The guy is pure Hollywood or Bollywood or something, just so good. He never misses “missing a line.”

That business about missing a stair on Air Force One, then saying the wind blew him over … pure Zen! Or the well-staged crack-up on the bike, that must have got the Chinese and Russians giddy, since Xi loves the outdoors and Putin plays hockey and rides horses, cannot seem to fall!

How Biden pulls off his daily botch, as if it is real, how he keeps egging them into aggression and screws up their militaries, especially Russia, with that “a little incursion” line is brilliant! Putin went right in, like it was planned!

Tricking the Taliban into taking Bagram Air Force base, making them keep all that “last year’s equipment,” and our allies – wow! If there was ever a “one-two punch” with just the one, that was it. I mean they think they did it. So does Russia, China, north Korea, Iran – even our allies.

And whoa, the Iran thing, catch that? He pretends he is going to reopen nuclear talks, promises money, tells them how Kerry got Trump, makes a big deal, then – right when oil gets expensive, since he put the pillow to US production – he says, oops, my bad, and backs out.

Talk about pissing people off everywhere, he got a “hat trick!” US voters pay more for gas, Iran goes nuclear on their nickel – and wow, did he piss off Saudi! I mean how do you do that, when they were about to join the Trump Peace Accords, and give them the back hand, make sure the world knows they do not answer your calls. Very cool. Rad. Fire.

So yeah, I mean being underestimated is this guy’s thing, “devil den red” on national TV to take down the “Great Americans,” calling them names, and then lighting up Union Station in DC on election eve, where he drove all the businesses bankrupt, now that – that – is Chutzpah!

Maybe the big thing is how he puts others in the catbird seat, while playing dumb, like his wife, who is always caught on mike whispering “honey wipe your lip” and “don’t step in that dear.” It is all so endearing in that “make believe we are in a nursing home” sort of way.

The Chicoms have to be drooling themselves, and he makes it so hard for them, because all of a sudden, he shouts at a reporter, and they suddenly think he is a nuclear power again, shudder.

And what about Putin thinking he is tough, when this guy crushes Styrofoam cups, woes teenage girls, smells their hair, reminds them his is real, almost. Putin must be livid, so dang jealous.

Then, the way Biden pretends to be half drunk, it comes off nicely, makes you think he practiced. He says he travelled 17,000 miles with Xi yet seems ever travelled together.

On energy, which he knows is “top of mind,” he reminds us of facts that never were, saying gas was five dollars when he took office, now is cheap. You gotta hand it to him. Any wonder Saudi shrugs and cuts production, since prices – real prices – do not matter?

He really has the beans, you know – first pushing inflation over nine percent, while releasing oil from a reserve meant to protect us in war, almost draining it – then says “seniors” are getting more Social Security. Talk about strutting his stuff!

He is a marvel, goes on and on, claiming to have signed laws that do not exist, were never put before Congress, shaking hands with phantoms, pretending he is playing pin the tail on the donkey, claiming to have done things and to know people who never existed, greeting dead people in public events, causing allies to think we are so bad we are good …

Bottom line, this guy is a master of underestimation, and if that is the name of the game – he wins. On the other hand, if not, something may be up. Just thinking on it. I do not want to cause a stir, but even the Washington Post gave him a “bottomless Pinocchio” last week. They do not understand, this is all an act, guy is primetime, Biden Show. Um, right?