![looking-forward woman looking forward into the sunset](https://static-asset.amac.us/wp-content/uploads/2023/08/24103148/looking-forward.jpg)
Stop the merry-go-round, big one with the horses, and one that hides in your keyboard and forces the daily spin, taking us in – blaring news from plasma on the wall, stop it all. To go forward, just look back. Most learned big things as kids we forget – and yet, if we stop, we remember.
When I was a teen, summers were filled with work – usually physical, less taxing in some ways than school, a kind of relief, even if days started early, ended late, an honest wage to compensate.
In practical terms, being part of the “outdoor crew” at a camp, days were spent with my hands occupied – mowing, clipping, sawing, hammering, scraping, sanding, painting, building, and admiring, then unplugging toilets, snaking showers, under a hood, putting out docks, and watching the clock.
That last bit was something we did, thinking pay was everything, for me 40 dollars a week, plus room and board, evenings for baseball, running, and life with friends. The lesson I thought I was learning was that hard work for dollars was the thing. In a way, it was – but there was more.
What came with my 40-dollar stub was something else, adults vesting responsibility in me, and me wanting their trust, working for it, taking personal responsibility. At the same time, I learned to balance work and play. They fed each other, another lesson; play shed stress, dawn reoriented the playful boy.
Over time, life skills learned during those hard, hot summers got used in other ways. I realized something else again. Pay in dollars – that honest wage to compensate – was just part of it. I now knew stuff.
On top of learning responsibility, trust, and play with work, I knew how to fix a sink trap or broken toilet, use a square, level, and plane, how to dry and wet sand, and polyurethane. I knew how to shingle straight, cut trees and build a cedar fence, knew the difference – between a chain, skill, and band saw.
Moreover, when needed, I could change a tire, oil, and sparkplugs, change blades on a mower, or when someone got stuck or broke down somewhere, I could hook up the chain, downshift, and tow ‘er. In short, I knew things – never forgot them, never will, real compensation for work and for working still.
In those days too, beyond learning to balance play with work, do things physical and mental, how to keep going, manage heat, cold, wind, rain, not complain, we spent time thinking about who we were and wanted to be, what could make us better. We thought this mattered, because older folks thought so.
For me, that meant Scouts. Even now, the 12 points of the “Scout Law” come as easily as the Lord’s Prayer or Pledge of Allegiance. We tried to learn, make ourselves useful, and keep those ideals before us.
What were they? Well, just be “trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent.” Simple right? Not always. We failed the “perfect line,” to borrow a perfect line from Bob Segar, but we knew where we were headed. The Scout Law said it.
Which brings to mind another point, lesson taught: Laws were not different for different people, but equal for all. If we got a ticket, we knew we had earned it. Honor and laws went together, always must.
Perhaps the biggest lesson of youth, beyond work’s value, personal responsibility, learning balance, constructive play, respect for laws, being dogged each day – was about people.
Treated well by elders, I learned respect. In time, their lessons flowed down, sure as water curls predictably over a dam. Their expectations made me who I am. These lessons translated into giving others a chance, expecting of them what I knew they could do, passing forward what was true.
Today, as the world gets squirrelly, remember lessons learned early. They still hold, never grow old. Timeless truths, each one a treasure, they still help us take our measure.
So, now and then, climb off the merry-go-round, stop the spinning. I go fly a kite, take a hike, or get on a bike. I like to think this is smart, or a start – looking back to go forward, like using a chalk line roofing. Einstein probably said it best: “Life is like riding a bicycle – to keep your balance you must keep moving.”
Robert Charles is a former Assistant Secretary of State under Colin Powell, former Reagan and Bush 41 White House staffer, attorney, and naval intelligence officer (USNR). He wrote “Narcotics and Terrorism” (2003), “Eagles and Evergreens” (2018), and is National Spokesman for AMAC.
Very good article RBC. Yes, learning new skills and how to prioritize things does help in all manner of things as we move through life. Knowledge, balance and more skills are always good things, as they all end up helping us see the forest for the trees. Life is constant change and how we navigate those changes determines how our lives, and those we interact with, will turn out.
LOVE this article, Bobby! You made me smile because it reminded me how important it is to reflect on one’s journey. Many are taught that looking back is a bad thing! On the contrary, looking.back helps you see how very far you have come and focuses on your strengths that were developed from failures and “stumbles in life.” You can only grow when you have made mistakes and experienced disappointment/ heartbreak. Learning responsibility, trust, and what qualities are required to be a good person, are imperative to moving forward. Being trusted with a job is where we learn problem solving, dependability, being your best, and living within your means. All life’s lessons! And, in closing, let’s not forget the importance of time for yourself. Bike riding, a walk through the woods, kayaking down a quiet river…time to wonder and smile. Once again, thank you for my making me smile.
Life is constant change, it’s adapting to and accepting it that matters most. The main thing is to always maintain a positive attitude and change with the flow. Change what you can but accept what you can’t change.
Very good to review, where you’ve been to where you’re going. Biblical values, ethics, standards, respect, skills & work were common character builders. It was to help one achieve, find their worth in life & success. We were told, “idle hands were the devil’s workshop.” It’s wise to find your God given gift, & purpose in life. We hope many in this present generation are doing the same. Thank you for your service.
Robert you just described my youth. I wish all teenagers and young people in their 20’s and 30’s could read this. But as soon as they see the words, hard work, they are turned off. They think doing nothing and have the government take care of them is the way to go. They call us stupid. Only in time they will find out there is not a tradesman left to fix their car or replace a leaky toilet. Or build them a house. Robots can’t do everything. Certainly not how to get along with people. Or learn anything from their elders. There is no respect for us. I see our culture disappearing rapidly for it is rewritten by the dems every day. We are way beyond civil dialogue. Ole Joe hates anyone MAGA and will keep on eliminating them by persecuting Trump. Only he is mistaken. We will still be there with Trump or without him. It’s the people stupid.
Good article but written in a language unfamiliar to today’s youth
For me, learning these life skills came from 20-years in the Navy. Once you don a firefighting ensemble and enter a smoke-filled main space, or steered the ship from af steering, or spent 36-hours awake on a job, you kind of gain confidence in other things! I’m just sorry I waited until age 27 to join and not wasted my late teen-early twenties years!
Right ON!!!
I was right there with you all the way!
Well put!
Too many free range indoctrination degrees out there that are use less to the other 90 %
This is a great article. I grew up the same way but I also learned about farming, cattle, all kinds of livestock and how to care for them. Even to putting them down and helping them give birth. Fixed all kinds of vehicles and equipment. I also learned gun safety and hunting techniques. I grew up with guns but never ever shot anyone and neither did my guns. I also had bow and arrows and hunting knives but was raised to know proper use and care. I dint have time to go after people either verbally or mentally as I was always tired or working. That’s one reason I became very successful. I went from going to bed with no food..literally.. holes in my shoes and in my jeans( not on purpose). I was raised to respect others and know when to stand up and when just to keep quiet. . The thing I am most proud of is, I have peoples respect and true friends and.. my Mom and Brothers are proud of me. My Dad died when I was 3 but I did not use excuses and became something he would be proud of…I was raised with the verse…A good name is to be treasured above gold and silver..
oh by the way I am a woman and proud to be. Grew up with Brothers and wore their Hand me downs after they were patched and repatched…. I am also a Christian who believes in God. I would rather live a good life an go nowhere after death than BE A MINION OF SATAN and find out…THERE REALLY IS A GOD AND A HEAVEN but I am not going to see it.
Talking about summer jobs – I spent the summers of 1961 through 1965 on a very rustic guest ranch in Glacier National Park. My first summer’s pay was $60 per month plus room & board. Thank you for bringing back those memories.
F. J. B.