Will Rogers (1879-1935) was a funny man. Born long ago this month, he was a comic, and never funnier than when lampooning Congress, turning stuff upside down, hopeful but a realist. Today, as I peeled apples for applesauce, my mind wandered to Rogers, and what he would say about our mess.
Neighbors in Maine gave me apples – way too many. They grow all kinds, Empire, Honey Crisp, MacIntosh, you name it. Peeling apples, I pondered life, politics, humor, and how they relate. Like honey, cinnamon, and apples, they mix, but sometimes make a mess. Still, I am hopeful.
You know, God organized the seasons just right, figured out how to make sunshine, get rain to fall, trees to grow, and apples to taste good. Congress cannot organize anything except reelection.
Will Rogers had a wry wit. Even today, it fits. He said what he thought, and pointed out ironies. These days, they pile up like yellow, red, and brown leaves, soon enough like banks of snow.
Said Rogers, “Democrats are the only reason to vote for Republicans.” He just wanted some competence, authenticity, honesty, and maybe a bit of lighthearted humor in the nation’s leaders.
He might be surprised at 2024. He wrote: “I would love to see Mr. Henry Ford in there, really. I don’t know who started the idea that a President must be a politician, instead of a businessman. A politician can’t run any other kind of business, so there is no reason why he can run the U.S. … biggest single business in the World.” Bingo!
Lighter still, he thought politics was expensive, and that was when a dollar was worth a hundred. He wrote: “A fool and his money are soon elected,” “America has the best politicians money can buy,” and “I don’t make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.”
Fearing the end of humor, looking at how politicians behaved, he quipped: “Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.”
Watching education slip in the 1920s, he proposed a simple plan. “Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don’t they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.”
When complimented on being a funny man, he said: “It’s easy to be a humorist, when you’ve got the whole government working for you.” Ba-dump-bump!
Not big on the government spending his money, he was clear. “Politicians are just a bunch of local bandits sent by their local voters to raid the public treasury.” Today, banditry is legal.
On election integrity, he poked both parties, would understand how Harris hijacked Biden while he slept: “More men have been elected between sundown and sunup than ever were elected between sunup and sundown.”
As I got to the bottom of my apple bag and finished peeling, slicing, and depositing apple chunks into my saucepan, hopeful Washington may somehow get on track, another Rogers line drifted back.
Then as now, his wit rings true. Looking at the mess around me, hopeful something good would come of it, I thought of Rogers. He summed life, politics, and humor this way. “I tell you folks, all politics …is applesauce.”
Robert Charles is a former Assistant Secretary of State under Colin Powell, former Reagan and Bush 41 White House staffer, attorney, and naval intelligence officer (USNR). He wrote “Narcotics and Terrorism” (2003), “Eagles and Evergreens” (2018), and is National Spokesman for AMAC. Robert Charles has also just released an uplifting new book, “Cherish America: Stories of Courage, Character, and Kindness” (Tower Publishing, 2024).
Robert, I thank you for the source of Will Rogers’ humor! A friend gave me a book on Rogers and I loaned to to someone and they never gave it back. I bet Rogers has a line of loaning out books!
I quoted Rogers often as I had many of his quips on my hard drive and I lost that drive some time back! I visited Rogers home in Oklahoma about 15 years ago. When the damn was to be built, Rogers’ home was moved from being adjacent to the river to the plateau above the Oologah River, forming the Oologah Lake.
The problem I realized that where Rogers’ home is presently located, they must have drilled a very deep well. When I pointed this out to the staff, I was told I was one of the very few to notice. I was told his home was adjacent to the river during his life time. The mesa above the river where his home now stands was Rogers’ airstrip.
The Rogers museum in Oologah is worth the visit! Oologah is north from Tulsa about 25 miles
May Rogers’ sense of humor live long! America still needs humor!.
“Ignorance lies not in the things you don’t know, but in the things you know that ain’t so.”
One of my favorite Will Rogers quotes.
But my favorite Will Rogers quote is:
“This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer”
There are things about Will Rogers that could benefit American culture today for sure. It is a good quality to promote the kind of humor he had — it was about maintaining a sense of humor ,to help people to keep going even when things are not what were expected . Found two Will Rogers quotes from the Will Rogers Memorial Museum list of quotes — ” Papers say ” Congress is deadlocked and can’t act.” I think that is the greatest blessing that could befall this Country.”. And. S ” The biggest praise that a humorist can have is to get your stuff in the Congressional Record. Just think my name will be alongside all those other big humorists.”
We need more articles like this.
Thanks for the laugh!
Here are some more Will Rogers quotes: “The more you observe politics, the more you’ve got to admit that each party is worse than the other.” “Be thankful we’re not getting all the government we’re paying for.” “Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.” “Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what’s going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate?” And, “Things in our country run in spite of government, not by aid of it.”
Only God knows that we absolutely need this kind of wit, wide open, today. The Reprehensibles are completely humorless.
He was gone before I was born but I always enjoyed reading about his life and also him singing.
I needed a good laugh!
Thank you Dr. (I assume) Charles.. I needed that “lift”. Wednesday was a Brighter, encouraging day. In the aftermath, the stated, and demonstrated, obstructive stance of the left and our Government institutions has marred the shine on my apple. Silly me, I thought “We the People” made both, our choice,and our voice rather clear on Tuesday. Our “remedy has been chosen. Sadly we must wait until Jan.20, for him to start work. Meanwhile, we’re stuck with the same malfeasant actors, and murder is still illegal.. We need an immediate remedy!
FYI Oklahoma City is the only city with 2 airports named after guys who died in a plane crash. (Will Rogers and Wiley Post)
I think Will also said, “The United States of America has the best politicians money can buy.”
Visit world’s largest Arbys in the Tricities area of Colonial Heights, it was once a Will Rodgers restaurant and has quotes on almost every wall.
For a daily dose of 365 Will Rogers quotes and images, search the Apple App Store for “Will Rogers Daily Quotes.” Robert’s article gives you an introduction to Will Rogers’ timeless wit. His quotes about life and politics are as true today as they were then.
Here’s one of my favorites: “It sure did kick up some excitement in the Senate when Senator [George H.] Moses called the other Senators “sons of wild jackasses.” Well, if you think it made the Senators hot, you wait till you see what happens when the jackasses hear how they have been slandered.”
I could be wrong but wasn’t he a socialist? I’m more of a Rickles fan anyways.