Joe Biden’s Rockin’ Holiday Album

Posted on Saturday, December 23, 2023
by AMAC, D.J. Wilson
Biden Christmas

Highlighting awful policies in cheerful holiday songs

In search of some cringe-worthy holiday tunes? Need a last-minute gift for someone you dislike? This unconventional holiday album is filled with horrid jingles on topics including the lousy economy, poor decision making, malarkey, gibberish, babble, idiocy, hogwash, and baffling Biden-isms. Voted “Best Pessimistic Album of the Year” by three thugs who jumped the border wall. Featuring background singing by the Majority Whip Choir, accompanied by giggling Vice President Kamala Harris. Also featuring a special performance by Nancy Pelosi, tearing up all the holiday sheet music she can find and bellowing cuss words.

Biden solos include:

  • Away in a Basement
  • The Twelve Days of Mandates
  • All I Want for Christmas is My Two Booster Vaccines
  • Have Yourself a Merry Little Naptime
  • We Wish You a Merry…you know the thing…
  • Gaffin’ Around the Christmas Tree

With wretched holiday songs on the economy:

  • I’ll be Homeless for Christmas
  • O’ Little Town of Poverty
  • Socialism is Coming to Town!
  • Nuttin’ for Christmas
  • It’s Beginning to Look a Lot like Stimulus Check Time

And these bad policy favorites:

  • Deck the Halls with Voter Fraud!
  • O’ Come all ye Illegally!
  • Border Walls Ain’t Comin’ to Town

Of course, we can’t forget Biden’s beloved teleprompters hits:

  • Do you Hear what I Read?
  • Santa, Can’t You Hear Me?

And some favorite global warming hits, too:

  • Let it Pour! Let it Pour! Let it Pour!
  • Baby, it’s Hot Outside
  • Frosty the Snowmelt
  • The Little Summer Boy
  • Rudolph the red-nosed Rained here

And many sentimental tunes, including:

  • I saw Biden Sniffing Santa’s Hair
  • It’s beginning to “Look, fat,” a lot Like Christmas
  • March of the Wooden Lying Dog-faced Pony Soldiers
  • That Guy who Runs that Outfit Over There is Coming to Town!
  • It’s the Most Blunderful Time of the Year!


Of the Album, Biden shares, “If we sing everything right, if we do it with absolute certainty, there’s still a 30% chance we’re going to sing it wrong.” The President then describes his album in full detail, “This is a big f____ deal.” When asked which song is his favorite, Biden replied, “Come on, man, I like the one that goes…Chestnuts Roasting on the…you know the thing. He continues, “The greatest gift is the ability to forget – so forget about buying this album.”

Album on Sale Nowhere Near You.

All proceeds go to the Defund Santa and his Reindeer Movement, Frosty the Snowmelt Global Warming Fund, Elves-lives Matter, Gaffe Machine Association for the Promotion of Presidential Blunders, the Build Back Better Snowmen Committee, The Snow Globe Infrastructure Initiative, Nancy Pelosi’s Ice Cream Addiction Therapy Sessions, The Governmental Waste Committee for Misspending, The North Pole Penalty Tax Advocates, The Board to Decrease the Surplus Gingerbread Population, The Red and Green New Deal, the Committee for Runaway Federal Spending, the Bah Hum Bug Club Against Holiday Cheer, and finally the Socialist Takeover Endowment for the Utter Destruction of Mankind. Happy Holidays & hope you enjoyed the laughs!