Opinion

Love and Strangers

love“Who would you fall in love with if you couldn’t see?”

I looked up at the elderly gentleman who asked me that question last night and said, “I’m actually not sure.”

“Think about it,” he said. “You might be surprised.”

I was at an old bookstore, sifting through page after page of wrinkled text, remembering days so many years ago when I’d spend hours in graduate school library stacks deciphering articles in Spanish literature and trying to find answers to questions that sometimes weren’t meant to be answered.

“Who would you fall in love with if you couldn’t see?”

I started to think about the men I’ve loved in my life. There haven’t been many, but I think that the few who really touched my heart would’ve gotten to me no matter what.

The first was so smart, so passionate about what he believed in. He and I agreed on almost nothing, but I fell in love with his passion for what he believed, for the truth that guided him through this crazy thing called life.

Another was so selfless, so completely determined to make me happy, such a beautiful soul. When visiting people’s homes or animal shelters, puppies and kittens would flock to him because they sensed he’d have their back. They were right.

Physical attraction is so powerful. The way someone looks can pull your eyes across a room. I’ve had that happen a handful of times. But physical attraction won’t keep you beside them. It won’t make you want to stay up all night with them and laugh about the idiocy of your decisions and question everything and anything about this world we live in.

I didn’t know the gentleman in the bookstore who asked me that question about love from a hole in the wall. But I’m so glad I met him. Because he reminded me that when someone catches your gaze, ask yourself if they’d catch your soul. Ask yourself if you’d want to put on the ugliest pajamas you own and stuff your face with the most unflattering food in the most unflattering way with them at 3am.

We forget the important questions sometimes. At least I do. Thank you, stranger, for reminding me.

Jedediah Bila is a Fox News host and commentator, author, columnist, and former professor and academic dean. Follow Jedediah on Twitter @JedediahBila.

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Joanne
5 years ago

I told my sons and daughter that looking for a man or woman who will make you laugh is silly pursuit. Life is often difficult and a spouse who has good character traits will serve you the best. The laughs will come naturally and spontaneously as you journey through life. Often the small, insignificant and trivial things bring the best laughs. Yes, laughter is often the best medicine but character is king.

Old Red Top
5 years ago

I will tell you this, I would love to be 30n years younger and meet you. I would whisk you off your feet and treat you like a princess. I would want to explore your mind and we could become world explorers searching out and solving the problems of the world. But Alas, I am not 30 years younger, and you my dear lady must look with your eyes and your heart. Not letting either one taking more than 50%. Life is a journey. You want the good and the not so good. You want to be exposed to it… Read more »

David
5 years ago

Many people who are looking for a spouse forget that physical attractiveness is only a very tiny part (even a trivial part) of what makes a good husband or wife. True love is best described in the traditional marriage vow, “in sickness and health to death do us part.” You marry a whole person and looks are only a small part of what makes someone attractive.

Vinnie
5 years ago

I would have fallen in love with my current wife even if I would have been blind. When we met she was so funny, helpful, wise and she was able to make me laugh at almost anything. She has an inner spirit that is infectious. I had been married once before and we married for what we thought was love. I am sure that we were just to young to know better at the time. When my second marriage came along we connected on so many levels. I know that she would be the one for me because she puts… Read more »

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